(As with most things mothering-related…)

Here I am writing a blog post because none of my *almost/hopefully/soon-to-be* friends (moved here to H-Town a year ago, so I have almost 2 now – that’s good, right?) were available at the last minute to come to my place or the local ice-house/yuppie* wine-bar to listen to me drivel about my quandaries.

*A side note on the word yuppie…

Yes, I just wrote the word yuppie. Outdated slang is maybe more accurate than carbon dating. Sidenote:  are you my age? (born 1980ish)? Do you use this term? Isn’t it the original hipster terminology – like the original term for hipster before we had the term hipster? I mean how fucking hipster is it to have a word *for* hipster *before* hipsters existed that most hipsters don’t even likely know about? And I reference Portlandia, which is like the hipster what – bible? Dictionary? – as  supportive evidence for this claim. Because me and the Frenchie just did catch up on like 3 episodes of the newest seasons so we now qualify as experts on the topic of hipster culture. And there was a sketch in which a punkrocker had been in coma for twenty-some  years and woke up in his previous state (punkrocker screaming DIE YUPPIE SCUM) with the t-shirt and everything to boot – only to realize – everyone’s now become a fucking yuppie. Fretting about their pontsing precious lattes and what-have-yous. Which is totally true.

So anyway, sidenote forgotten and back to the previously promised drivel…

In lieu of “girl talk”, here is what I would have said to my friend tonight at the winebar/ icehouse:

*I’m so grateful BB has a strong sense of self, but it can make it challenging when there’s a difference of opinion.

* Someday her leadership skills will be really needed and possibly welcomed, but right now they just really push my limits of my patience and general happiness.

*We really have had success enforcing boundaries.

What I would have actually said if it were my one real person whom I can really level with:

* Yeah she is so smart and bossy that she could be Supreme Court Justice. It will be really gratifying then, if she is still talking to me

*Boundaries are a joke, mothering is a joke, plans are for fools, we are all flying by the seat of our pants…

Just keep this handy if you need a translator. Pin it, or whatever.

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